It's officially December 30th! I can't believe 2011 is coming to an end. It seems like it was a whirlwind. I remember as a kid all the adults telling us that it flies by when you get older. I am 37 and thought they meant much older.
I went and had a gel manicure and pedicure today and was sitting at my salon I have been going to for years. It was pretty quiet which I was surprised. As I was chatting it up with the ladies, I remember sitting in there last year at this exact time and it felt like it was only a couple of months ago. I was picking out my sparkly nails for a night out on the town. So quick.
As 2011 comes to a close, I am excited to not make a NYE resolution that I know I will fail at once again... losing weight. I am going into 2012 with a new confidence as I know the band will change my life once and for all.
2 yrs ago I contemplated getting the band. I have great insurance and made an appt with the same surgeon I am with today. I read his website and the users comments (smaller and less frequented site as lapbandtalk.com) and then chickened out. I apparently wasn't mentally ready. I read the stories of vomiting a lot and PB'ing and getting stuck and the foods I would never be able to eat again. I am 100% Sicilian. To me, that scared the beezeejus out of me that I may NEVER taste the sacred pasta again. I wasn't ready to end my love affair. I don't have issues with chips and candy and junk food. That isn't my vice. I am a food snob. I want truffle pastas and homemade sauces, truffle pom frittes, garlicky gooness on bread... I am a certified carb addict in the pasta, potato and ice cream (occasional) variety. Sugary cereals mean nothing to me.. but tell me I can never have my amazing lasagna again and I would bite your head off. - Until later this year that is.
Something clicked. Something changed. My internal voice that was so scared telling me to run like hell and join WeightWatchers for the 1 billionth time told me it was time. Time to stop making excuses and time for the girl that is trapped inside for way too long to emerge.
See, I love fashion just as much as that pasta. That my friends is what is going to help me on this new journey. I will trade french fries for smaller sizes and I think that is a good compromise, don't you think??
So closing out 2011, a lot has transpired this year. Some great things and some not so great things. But I know 2011 is going to FINALLY BE MY YEAR!!
So I say Cheers, Slainte, Op uw gezonheid, A vortre sante, Salud, Salute, and Prosit to my fellow readers, bandsters or people on the beginning path like myself. This is your year too!
Happy New Years - Until 2012.
Thursday, December 29, 2011
Monday, December 26, 2011
It went by SO fast...
Christmas that is. I can't believe so much work to get to the big day. Months of buying the perfect gifts, cooking and baking for hours, wrapping a ton of gifts, and it just goes by so fast. I think I would almost have post holiday blues except this year I have my LAST monthly supervised visit with my PCP on Jan 5th and then I am submitted. I am so ready for that day to get here.
I am not one to rush holidays and wish them over... but this year, I don't mind them flying by.
I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas. I know I did for the most part. I have an amazing family and we all had a very nice time. My dad (step dad) turned into cranky-asshole-pants for a brief moment on Christmas Eve and sent my mom and I on a pretty bad mood for a bit. I love and adore him but as he gets older, he just seems to be unhappy and such a control freak. Stupid shit too... nothing serious ever. I don't put up with it and I let him know it. I have my own issues and I know it but if you are going to ruin people's moods... do it for a real reason. For instance: He wanted to argue the fact that he INSISTED we ALWAYS open our gifts Christmas Eve. I told him years ago we did but for the past few yrs, we open them AFTER breakfast at leisure on Christmas morning. He sat there in a tissy fit and basically telling me "I run the show" as if I am changing tradition and control everything. To be honest, I don't flipping care when we open the gifts but I knew I was right and well I wasn't backing down (this is part of my character flaw and I know it). But after 10 mins of being a prick about it for no reason, my nephew comes in and he asks him. My nephew proceeds to alert him we open our gifts on Christmas morning.
No shit.
He then gets all sweet like he wasn't challenging me and that he just forgot. I get the fact you forgot.. but don't be an asshole about it when you are wrong.
Anyways - more annoying things from him but he didn't ruin my Christmas. He did however get on my boyfriends nerves and instead of staying over 2 nights, he split after only one. I stayed and got a ride home which also made me take it on Zack (my bf). Dumb stupid stressful things that really have no significance in the grand scheme of things.
Other than that, we way OVERBUY on gifts. It looks like a department store at my parents house. My mom really took a ton of thought into my gifts. She knows I hate Wally Mart, She knows I despise that everything is Made in China and she knows I have an affinity for unique items and vintage finds. She really went above and beyond on finding me some of the coolest items that I will treasure forever. I mentioned a long time ago I wanted a vintage perfume atomizer. See, here is where our family goes overboard. She doesn't buy me one to start a collection... no she hit every antique store and online auctions and bought me a whole collection. From art-deco 20's to the 60's. Some really outstanding and beautiful pieces. She also knows I collect Vintage french poodles and she bought me a gorgeous pair from the 40's.
I received a ton of other items but the weirdest gift had to have been from my boyfriend. He is very supportive of me getting the band. He knows it's my obsession and isn't sick of me talking about which is nice. I know after he talks about boats for 10 hours, I want to rip my nails off with pliers. Not that I don't love boating, I just don't like hearing or discussing items until I am blue in the face... except for the Band lately. No complaints at all. So back to the gift.
He bought be a size MEDIUM sundress for the boat. This cute O'Neil dress that he probably paid too much for at one of the local and overpriced Surf Shop. I held it up and I don't think I could put one thigh in it now. He smiled and said he knew I would look great in it a year from now. No pressure right?? Uggg. It was sweet and weird and I put it swiftly back in the box. I took it back out trying to imagine me in it. I think I can.
I think it's going to be my incentive dress once I get the band and get back to the gym.
I also confessed to my brother and his girlfriend that I was electing to have surgery. My brother didn't understand at first. He thinks I am beautiful and I don't need it but after explaining him and showing before and after pics, he just was wowed over. His girlfriend Diana however was 100% for it and her SIL actually had it one year ago. Low and behold, she got ahold of her on Christmas morning. I don't know her but she was so awesome and nice. She has lost a whopping 140 pounds in one year. She lives super close to me and is only a year older than me. We exchanged numbers and are going to meet up for lunch and to talk. I am SO excited to maybe have a new band buddy so close. She may be wonderful "thin-spiration" for me as well.
So back to Christmas. (and sorry this is so long winded)
The food was beyond amazing. We have a Cuban/Spanish meal on Christmas Eve and a full on Italian/Sicilian meal on Christmas Day. A TON of leftovers which is nice because I won't have to cook all week however I know I will pack on a few pounds by the time this is all over.
We still have NYE ahead. We decided to throw a big NYE house party with the theme - End of the World Mayan Style. We live on the water and our backyard is FILLED with ferns and palm trees so it's perfect. We are adding Mayan faces, Mayan Calendar, tiki torches everywhere, fire pits and traditional Mexican and Belize style foods. Should be a lot of fun and my last party for awhile.
If anyone is reading this, what types of NYE parties are you going to or throwing?
Also, if anyone IS reading, please join so I know I have actual real-life people here and I will continue writing.
Happy New Year!
I am not one to rush holidays and wish them over... but this year, I don't mind them flying by.
I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas. I know I did for the most part. I have an amazing family and we all had a very nice time. My dad (step dad) turned into cranky-asshole-pants for a brief moment on Christmas Eve and sent my mom and I on a pretty bad mood for a bit. I love and adore him but as he gets older, he just seems to be unhappy and such a control freak. Stupid shit too... nothing serious ever. I don't put up with it and I let him know it. I have my own issues and I know it but if you are going to ruin people's moods... do it for a real reason. For instance: He wanted to argue the fact that he INSISTED we ALWAYS open our gifts Christmas Eve. I told him years ago we did but for the past few yrs, we open them AFTER breakfast at leisure on Christmas morning. He sat there in a tissy fit and basically telling me "I run the show" as if I am changing tradition and control everything. To be honest, I don't flipping care when we open the gifts but I knew I was right and well I wasn't backing down (this is part of my character flaw and I know it). But after 10 mins of being a prick about it for no reason, my nephew comes in and he asks him. My nephew proceeds to alert him we open our gifts on Christmas morning.
No shit.
He then gets all sweet like he wasn't challenging me and that he just forgot. I get the fact you forgot.. but don't be an asshole about it when you are wrong.
Anyways - more annoying things from him but he didn't ruin my Christmas. He did however get on my boyfriends nerves and instead of staying over 2 nights, he split after only one. I stayed and got a ride home which also made me take it on Zack (my bf). Dumb stupid stressful things that really have no significance in the grand scheme of things.
Other than that, we way OVERBUY on gifts. It looks like a department store at my parents house. My mom really took a ton of thought into my gifts. She knows I hate Wally Mart, She knows I despise that everything is Made in China and she knows I have an affinity for unique items and vintage finds. She really went above and beyond on finding me some of the coolest items that I will treasure forever. I mentioned a long time ago I wanted a vintage perfume atomizer. See, here is where our family goes overboard. She doesn't buy me one to start a collection... no she hit every antique store and online auctions and bought me a whole collection. From art-deco 20's to the 60's. Some really outstanding and beautiful pieces. She also knows I collect Vintage french poodles and she bought me a gorgeous pair from the 40's.
I received a ton of other items but the weirdest gift had to have been from my boyfriend. He is very supportive of me getting the band. He knows it's my obsession and isn't sick of me talking about which is nice. I know after he talks about boats for 10 hours, I want to rip my nails off with pliers. Not that I don't love boating, I just don't like hearing or discussing items until I am blue in the face... except for the Band lately. No complaints at all. So back to the gift.
He bought be a size MEDIUM sundress for the boat. This cute O'Neil dress that he probably paid too much for at one of the local and overpriced Surf Shop. I held it up and I don't think I could put one thigh in it now. He smiled and said he knew I would look great in it a year from now. No pressure right?? Uggg. It was sweet and weird and I put it swiftly back in the box. I took it back out trying to imagine me in it. I think I can.
I think it's going to be my incentive dress once I get the band and get back to the gym.
I also confessed to my brother and his girlfriend that I was electing to have surgery. My brother didn't understand at first. He thinks I am beautiful and I don't need it but after explaining him and showing before and after pics, he just was wowed over. His girlfriend Diana however was 100% for it and her SIL actually had it one year ago. Low and behold, she got ahold of her on Christmas morning. I don't know her but she was so awesome and nice. She has lost a whopping 140 pounds in one year. She lives super close to me and is only a year older than me. We exchanged numbers and are going to meet up for lunch and to talk. I am SO excited to maybe have a new band buddy so close. She may be wonderful "thin-spiration" for me as well.
So back to Christmas. (and sorry this is so long winded)
The food was beyond amazing. We have a Cuban/Spanish meal on Christmas Eve and a full on Italian/Sicilian meal on Christmas Day. A TON of leftovers which is nice because I won't have to cook all week however I know I will pack on a few pounds by the time this is all over.
We still have NYE ahead. We decided to throw a big NYE house party with the theme - End of the World Mayan Style. We live on the water and our backyard is FILLED with ferns and palm trees so it's perfect. We are adding Mayan faces, Mayan Calendar, tiki torches everywhere, fire pits and traditional Mexican and Belize style foods. Should be a lot of fun and my last party for awhile.
If anyone is reading this, what types of NYE parties are you going to or throwing?
Also, if anyone IS reading, please join so I know I have actual real-life people here and I will continue writing.
Happy New Year!
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
Checking in
It's a few days before Christmas and I feel like I am getting in way too many "last meals". I am not going in overload or anything but I keep thinking... "This may be the last time I can ever eat this". I realize I need to break up with food.
On another note, I am still plugging along with my appointments. I went into my monthly supervised weigh in's with my PCP and managed to lose a few pounds from last months even tho it's the holidays and I haven't been trying. I will say my next appointment may be a VERY different story. Holiday parties, Christmas, wine tasting parties, New Years Eve parties, baking a ton of Italian Cookies and dunking a couple in my coffee every few days (yum!) a sip of low fat eggnog, etc... It's such a gluttonous time of year.
My last appointment is with my PCP on January 6th. Then she will write the letter of medical necessity and I will be submitted to Insurance. Once I get the clear, I will go in for lab work, get a surgery date, an EKG and chest x-ray. I had my psyche eval last week. He was a fantastic guy and is considered the "LapBand" psychiatrist. He runs a support group and was very knowledgeable about the subject. It was extremely encouraging and I know I can see him again for free at the support group meetings he holds at the hospital of where my surgery will be performed. He thought I was very ready and would do great with it.
Other than that, I am wrapping a million gifts and trying to wear all my holiday outfits I bought. While they are cute, I am hoping I will never wear them again :)
Happy Hanukkah and Merry Christmas to anyone who may read this. I somewhat feel like this is a black hole and no one has read them.
Some photos from recent outings and I think one of my "Before" photos. I thought I looked cute when I left the house but after seeing these photos... ooooof.
One is from this past weekend's Winter Solstice Party with my friend I have known since childhood. I was pretty toasted by the end of the night and told him I was getting a Lap-Band. His response, "WHY"? You don't need it. In my mind I did ok convincing him but since I had about 4 winter white cosmos and 2 Lychee Martini's, I have no clue. I may need to circle back on that convo!
On another note, I am still plugging along with my appointments. I went into my monthly supervised weigh in's with my PCP and managed to lose a few pounds from last months even tho it's the holidays and I haven't been trying. I will say my next appointment may be a VERY different story. Holiday parties, Christmas, wine tasting parties, New Years Eve parties, baking a ton of Italian Cookies and dunking a couple in my coffee every few days (yum!) a sip of low fat eggnog, etc... It's such a gluttonous time of year.
My last appointment is with my PCP on January 6th. Then she will write the letter of medical necessity and I will be submitted to Insurance. Once I get the clear, I will go in for lab work, get a surgery date, an EKG and chest x-ray. I had my psyche eval last week. He was a fantastic guy and is considered the "LapBand" psychiatrist. He runs a support group and was very knowledgeable about the subject. It was extremely encouraging and I know I can see him again for free at the support group meetings he holds at the hospital of where my surgery will be performed. He thought I was very ready and would do great with it.
Other than that, I am wrapping a million gifts and trying to wear all my holiday outfits I bought. While they are cute, I am hoping I will never wear them again :)
Happy Hanukkah and Merry Christmas to anyone who may read this. I somewhat feel like this is a black hole and no one has read them.
Some photos from recent outings and I think one of my "Before" photos. I thought I looked cute when I left the house but after seeing these photos... ooooof.
One is from this past weekend's Winter Solstice Party with my friend I have known since childhood. I was pretty toasted by the end of the night and told him I was getting a Lap-Band. His response, "WHY"? You don't need it. In my mind I did ok convincing him but since I had about 4 winter white cosmos and 2 Lychee Martini's, I have no clue. I may need to circle back on that convo!
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